Why Your Only Limitation to Your Success Is... Your Mind
I actually wrote this post a few weeks back, prepared it to publish, and now it seems incredibly fitting since I've just left my job to go solo.
To be honest, it feels somewhat liberating. Since Deals in High Heels conceptualisation, my passions shifted into branding, writing and digital marketing. A figment of my imagination, conjured up from a desire for success and an understanding that hard work would get me there, Deals in High Heels has taught me many things about my mind's limitations.
As she IS me, you can probably guess that we have a lot in common: we both love business books, office fashion and high heels. Our favourite food is sushi and we both play football with a team of Frenchmen. Deals in High Heels doesn't have her life all figured out either, in fact, it's quite the opposite - she's still navigating her way through this confusing career world, but tries to learn something new and reflect everyday.
My alter ego. It's Deals in High Heels that pushes the boundaries - she's the one that moved me from a farm in New Zealand to Melbourne, New York, London and now Dubai. She questions "Why not?" "Who said that?" "You won't know unless you try" when I think I can't do something.
Any time I've felt a moment of self doubt the last week, I've acknowledged it and then quickly snubbed it. Why can't I do Deals in High Heels and my digital personal brand consulting full time?
"Well, you won't know unless you try."
I stumbled across this quote by Napoleon Hill in a book a few years back, and it resonated with me. Even now after moving to NYC, London and Dubai, and achieving things I'd never even considered; overcoming my mind's limitations still feels a continual battle.
Who else feels they over-analyze EVERYTHING?
Having a busy brain is exhausting. Continually considering how others perceive you, reflecting on the way you did something and scrutinizing how you could be better. From this, creating an over-exaggerated persona and disjointed perception of what you can and cannot do.
I want you to think back to a time you wanted a change. Maybe you thought about moving to a new job or a change of profession entirely? Perhaps, you considered moving country or breaking things off with a partner who is holding you back?
I know: Having that first thought of an idea is invigorating. But then come all the what-ifs, buts and maybes. Few ideas are followed through.
In 2014, after four months of waiting tables until 2am at a beach-side restaurant in St Kilda, and then waking up at 5am to serve coffees and muffins in a take-away tuck shop outside Flinders Street Station, I was exhausted - physically and mentally. I knew something had to change.
When I decided I was going to move to NYC in eight weeks, I had THOUSANDS of objecting thoughts. Not only from friends and family, but me also! Despite working two jobs, I somehow had $0 to my name. I had never visited and knew no-one. Eight weeks was the fastest time my visa could be processed. I would need to work and save every waking second if I was miraculously going to pull this off.
I've learnt now that moments of desperation and failure are when you truly thrive.
When you are at your wits-end and hate everything, somehow pushing through your mind's limit become easier - you've got less on the table to sacrifice. If I had of got that 9-5 job I was looking for would I still be in Melbourne, still semi- hating my mundane life? Who knows.
Once you've done something crazy doing other crazy things become easier.
Not 'easy' but 'easiER.' Every time I felt stressed about my moves to London or Dubai, I reminded myself the bad-ass move I pulled to NYC. Draw strength from previous situations when your bravery surpassed.
Stop living your life for other people.
Much of our mind's limitations are comprised from the mere thought of what other people think and realistically, *they probably don't really care*. And if they do, did you consider they may have their own limitations behind their adverse opinion? It can be difficult when you finally break through your mind only to be confronted by a loved one or close friend. Appreciating that they care about you, it's tricky when their concerns mimic your own.
When I decided I would move to Dubai, I became overwhelmed by the number of friends who thought 'they knew best' about what the city was like. In fact, someone even admitted that half the reason he had an issue with me moving was because he was partly jealous that he had no commitments and felt too 'old' to move country.
Challenge your beliefs and thoughts.
Many of us accept the 'voice within' is factual, but now I find myself challenging my beliefs and assumptions on a regular basis. That’s because I know now what my beliefs actually are – thoughts, previously conditioned through my experiences. Growing up in New Zealand, it was hard not to feel the impact of ingrained Kiwi culture 'tall poppy syndrome' pushing for mediocrity.
Changing can take time.
And pushing down that brick wall takes strength. Limited minds were not formed over a day after all, rather it has taken years to develop these thought patterns.
Many people don't succeed, not because they don't have the skills, work ethic or qualities but because their minds may lead them to live their lives below their potential.
I challenge you, my lovely reader, next time you have an idea or dream that you want to follow through... hold onto it for a little longer. Think about it. And try and push down those walls of limitation.
Until next time,
Briar Prestidge xx
*This post contains affiliate links which mean I may receive a commission if you choose to buy something. As usual, I only post things I love.
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