Why No-One Owes You Anything
I know the steps I need to take to craft myself a successful future. I know I have to work for it, go out there and GET IT. My future is my responsibility and with some hard work, guts and perseverance, I can create a life by design.
But some people have a completely different mentality - they think they deserve a reward for simply existing. They go through life feeling like the world “owes them,” ordering restaurant dinners in a condescending tone. For some reason, they think they are truly unique and remarkable.
But here is the thing with entitlement: no one owes you anything.
Your boss doesn’t owe you a promotion unless you work for it and give your company true value. People don’t owe you respect unless you act in a way that demonstrates you are worthy of it.
Confidence and trust are earned by you, not owed to you. If you are messed around, don’t count on people to apologise or show you any expression of regret. If you lend someone money, don’t count your chickens that they will give it back.
During the darkest part of the night: who do you blame?
Unfortunately, when things don’t go according to plan (which is quite often the case with life) we have a tendency to pass the blame onto other people. And, rather than focusing on our preferred future, we pour our energy into questioning ‘what if?,’ somewhat infatuated and fixated on the minor wrongs of our past.
Move on. If you are so unhappy with how your life has turned out, then what can you do to turn it around?
Don’t like how your body looks? Exercise, eat healthy, drink water.
Financial issues? Consult an finance expert, work for it by doing whatever you can (even if it’s picking up a job doing something that you wouldn’t normally do). I know it’s not always so simple, but when I first started working as an entrepreneur I freelanced at events handing out Pringles or worked in an information booth to get by.
If there are obstacles in your way, re-evaluate, re-strategise and find a way to break through them. Try and approach the situation from a different perspective.
Plan a strategy for your vision
Goals, dreams, and aspirations: Many people falter and give up.
Instead, they opt for the easy route: They choose to ‘live’ their life confined within the concrete walls of their comfort zone. Trapped for years in this same-old mundane, they question loudly when they turn 50: “Was it not enough that I dreamed, hoped and wished for it?”
Thinking is required, but movement is necessary
So don’t wait for tomorrow, start today. What is one action (no matter how small) you can take? For instance, rather than spending 30 minutes scrolling aimlessly on Facebook, why don’t you read a book? Paint a picture. Go to the gym. Make a decision that will impact your future.
Recently, I started doing yoga again. It frustrates me how bad I am but I remind myself that in 10 years, after going 4 of 5 times a week, I’ll probably be an expert! It is never too late to take action.
Let the desire for what you want grow bigger than your fears
If you want it, go get it. Remember, “nothing ventured, nothing gained…” This means you may have to make some interim sacrifices for your long term success.
I think back to when I quit my corporate job with one month’s salary in my back pocket and no friends or family finances to rely on. The desire to have my own company and to do what I love was burning inside. I was blinded by failure. Because, I said to myself, is there even such a thing?
Our fear is supported by an illusion that it is possible to fail and if we fail, we are worthless? Wrong.
If we ‘fail,’ we learn from it and we do something else. If my company had of flopped, I would have returned to my corporate life, and ended up sleeping on a friend’s couch, or back on a plane to New Zealand. Remember, you cannot fail, you can only produce a different result.
My desire is to live an extra-ordinary life: to impact millions of lives, build multiple business empires and create communities that aid those less fortunate. To always give more than I get. To work on what excites me and pushes me. To invest in my life-long learning, publish at least five books, and leave a legacy. This desire to make the most of every second of my life is what propels me out of bed in the mornings.
But, surprise! You aren’t amazing.
Life isn’t bothered by your inflated Ego, your artificial sense of value, your Prada handbag or how important you feel your role is here on Earth – remember to play it cool. The solar system is almost 5 billion years old, Earth is roughly 4.5 billion years, and humans have only been around for 200,000 years. And you? You have existed for a mere MOMENT.
Express gratitude – there is always something to be thankful for. Is it a roof over your head, a meal, or a loving friendship? Practice yoga, take a walk on the beach.
Take a big breath of oxygen, deep into your lungs and remind yourself how thankful you are to even Be.
Be the change you want to see
As Mahatma Gandhi once said, “You must be the change that you want to see in the world.” By changing how you feel and view the world, you change your thinking patterns and rewire your brain. Subsequently, your actions will change; you will interact with your surroundings and others in a completely different way.
No-one owes you anything… is this a selfish thought?
No. Because even though the world owes me nothing, I believe that I owe a lot to the world. Adopting a ‘giving’ mentality doesn’t mean allowing people to take advantage of you, but as Winston Churchill aptly stated, “We make a living by what we get. We make a life by what we give. Even if it’s just attention, advice, or time.”
Wake up tomorrow and commit to being the change you want to see. Take two small steps, whether they are towards your health, financial independence or career advancement, and create your life by design.
Until next time,
Briar Prestidge xx