6 Reasons Why You Should Live Life For Yourself And No One Else
There are two profound moments of my life that really stand out for me.
The first was when I moved from my town in New Zealand, across the other side of the world, to New York City.
The second was when I left the safety net of my corporate job and started my own business full time: Briar Prestidge (Digital Personal Branding) and this blog and community, Deals in High Heels.
In both situations friends, family and colleagues pestered me with their concerns. Although they had my best interests in mind, I could see by the looks on their faces that they didn’t believe I could do it.
“What will you do for a job?” “Where will you live?” “Do you have enough money?” “You’ll be back in a few months.” “…What will happen if you FAIL?” “How will you do it?”
Thank goodness even though their thoughts troubled me and made me doubt myself and my capabilities, I still followed my heart and gut. Soldiering on, one brave decision at a time, to create the life that I wanted.
And, I’m so happy I persevered! Living in all the big cities of the world – Melbourne, New York, London and now Dubai, leaving my job and working on my own business' full time, have been the greatest decisions I’ve ever made.
Imagine if I'd of listened to everyones opinions? Imagine if I’d never nurtured and watered those (at the time) small seeds, giving them confidence to grow into big ideas.
I’m sure I wouldn’t be close to anywhere I am today, with my third business in the making. Maybe I’d still be living that small-town-life I'd despised, bored and afraid. I wouldn’t be able to give the value I give to my community, to the brands I collaborate with, and to my clients.
But it wasn’t easy. I had to step out of my comfort zone, ignore opinions and challenge the ‘status quo.’ To go with whatever my heart and gut told me.
To live my life for myself.
And it feels great.
Stop being driven by the opinions of others! Here are 6 reasons why you should start living life for yourself
Others have their own motives
People often have their own limitations and concerns. Have you thought perhaps they don’t have your best interests at heart? It can be difficult when you voice your ideas to a trusted friend only to have them shut them down.
Often people will project their own insecurities onto you. They (maybe subconsciously) put themselves in your shoes and blurt out the things they feel challenged about. They say things to try hold you back based on things that hold THEM back.
Only you know what you are capable of
Do you hear that little voice inside your heart that tells you that you can do something, even if it’s frightening or ‘impossible’? That voice is usually right and you should trust it, despite what others may say.
Go on, prove to yourself that you can do it. I surprised myself with my first move to NYC. Now, every time someone tells me I can’t do something a voice in my head pipes up, “Wanna bet?”
Do what you love
YOU have the power to proactively drive your life path so that it aligns with your passions. In New York, I got a job as a waitress initially and then studied for my real estate licence because I was obsessed with the sky rises. In London, I worked in recruitment, then conceptualised and built Deals in High Heels because I loved writing and digital marketing.
Follow your dreams! What new skills can you seek? What books or online info can you read? Who in your network can you learn from?
People will appreciate you more
You owe it to people to lead your best and most authentic life. I’m so thankful every day to be able to share my digital knowledge, help companies with branding and marketing, run events we learn from and a community that women feel empowered to be a part of.
You’ll feel more fulfilled
Because instead of spending time worrying or trying to please others, you use the energy on yourself doing whatever you want, whenever you want.
After a while, you will start to care less what other people think and it becomes a positive cycle.
But even though we want something, we often don’t do anything about it.
“I don’t have enough time.” “I’m too tired.” “I’ll do it next month.” Does this sound like you? We often make up excuses to stay as we are. Being in our comfort zone means reduced stress and tends to be a low-risk area. It’s safe and familiar.
Many people don’t want to leave this state of mental security - even if they are bored of it. Many people stay stuck in their routines, but not because they want to be there.
Jumping out of your comfort zone requires you to make mistakes, to learn, to feel scared at times, TO THROW YOURSELF INTO THE LIMELIGHT AND TO FACE THE CRITICISM OF OTHERS; but that’s where the magic happens. Creation is just ongoing change, nothing in this world is stagnant, so I encourage you not to be, either.
“For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, it’s insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn’t understand growth, it would look like complete destruction.” Cynthia Occelli.